I walked into Carnival to have a much needed ice cream to cool off! (what with all the tension and yuckiness of this stupid semester!) As I sat digging into my chocolate choc chip I happened to see two love birds (the human kind) enjoying each other (having forgotten their melting ice creams) in the usual way that all these couples do. The hugging, caressing, the teasing and the whispering of sweet nothings while their eyes roam around to see if anyone's watching before they peck the lover on the lips! hahaha ok even though the image is a bit too sweet I don't mean it in like a sarcastic way.
so I continued to discreetly watch them. It brought back memories..nice ones.. of those early days when Raiya and I had just started to go out. That was us, then. While I watched this random couple enjoying their relationship (which most obviously was in the infant stage) and smiled to myself remembering memories of not so long ago it struck me that change is inevitable.
we've been going out for nearly 1.5 years now and somewhere in between I realized that we were not what we had been. And this troubled me. We fought more, we no longer agreed with each other on every single thing, the stress, the tension of everyday life had creeped in. Our lives were no longer the fairy tale it had seemed to be. And I rebelled against this change coz I wanted to hold onto that " fairy tale, dream land" kind of relationship where all was sweet and none was sour!
But watching those two strangers I realized that while we are now not what we were...we have evolved into something much better. We no longer have those mushy, hand holding, "oh my gosh i love love love love u" dates coz our love and our relationship has gone beyond that and developed and matured into something stronger and deeper and in a sense much more.. real.
Yes those days were beautiful and perfect. Perfect in a surreal way.
we are imperfect now. we fight, we argue, we disagree. But we still love. And even though at times I was troubled, grappling with change and wondering whether our love had lost its intensity..I missed the mark. I failed to see that it was not our love that had changed but it was rather ourselves. over time we have grown to know each other inside out, we have reached a comfort zone that most people don't even reach after 5 years of marriage. we no longer need to hold hands and whisper sweet nothings to reassure each other of our love. We don't need to text each other 24x7. We don't need that reassurance, that superficiality.. coz we know who we are now and we know that what we share is real. It's not a dream. It's real and it's what binds us together. forever.
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